I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Randomize
