Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
Randomize
