just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Randomize
