3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
"it" just moved
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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