check it out our google latitudes are spooning
My dog fell asleep in his puke last night. He's only 5 weeks old and has more in common with my friends than I do.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
Randomize
