Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
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