marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
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