I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
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