tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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