The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize
