She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
Randomize
