With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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