it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
We walked through the hotel lobby in slow-mo taking huge steps because we were astronauts, and astronauts obviously can't be drunk.
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
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