i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
Everything about him screamed your future.
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Listen man, there's two things I know about in life: porn and sound. On a day that I'm wearing khakis, I need you to trust that I know what the fuck I'm doing.
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
