I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
Mass text: dear whatever jerk off who thinks they stole drugs from me. It was birth control. Go fuck yourself. And pray that I don't get pregnant.
Who puts their birth control in a bottle with a smiley face?!
Oh fuck wait
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Randomize
