If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
Randomize
