mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
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