Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
Randomize
