I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
Randomize
