All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
Randomize