lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Randomize
