Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
