I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
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