The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
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