Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
Randomize
