it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
my fingers and penis are no longer on speaking terms. My penis is too jealous of where my fingers get to go.
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
Randomize
