This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
Randomize
