it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize
