he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
Randomize
