I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
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