I must be too annoying 4 u.
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
Randomize