Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
Randomize
