I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
Randomize
