Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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