hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
Randomize