There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
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