I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
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