i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
Well apparently he's into motor boating.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
Randomize
