think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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