i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
Randomize
