Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Randomize
