My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
