Me too!
i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Randomize
