Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
