her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
well, you know. whores of a feather.
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
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