Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
Randomize
