why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
When I'm drunk and can't pee, I sing my abc's in my head and try to pee before I get to pee. Last night I forgot to do it in my head
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
Randomize