ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
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