I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
Randomize