fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
