hell yes lets make some ravioli
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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