I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
