Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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